Rihanna: Civil Rights Crusader

Rihanna‘s never been known for her politics — and she’s even gone on record for basically not giving a fuck. So it comes as a surprise that the popstar has taken to the pulpit after a pair of racially-motivated attacks on her person, using grown-up and official-sounding words like “poor representation of the evolution of human rights” and “disregarding an entire race” and “intent of abasement.” ? Next thing we know, RiRi will turn in her girlish hotpants for a ladyish pantsuit and start partaking in discussions on the state of black America with Professor Cornel West in? between? lunches with Michelle Obama.

Rihanna: Civil Rights Crusader

The first incident stems from a run-in at a Lisbon hotel — shortly after a “legendary” performance in the Portuguese capital involving at least one throw-up break — ? that prompted Rihanna to tweet this blow for freedom :

“I just met the most racist cunt EVER!!! This man said the craziest shit abt black women called us dogs, sluts, we don’t look like shit, we? don’t belong in the same hotels….needless to say, the #NIGGA in me came out! Bajan accent and all!Lol!Turns out the hotel manager’s black[...]Oh and he had the NERVE to diss black people in his Tighty whitey’s!!!! SMH[shake my head]…and tbh [to be honest] a lil black wouldn’t hurt him”

Just when she thought she had finished getting her Rihanna Luther King ? on, there comes this hokey piece of journalism courtesy of Dutch fashion magazine, Jackie:

?€?She has street cred, she has a ghetto ass and she has a golden throat. Rihanna, the good girl gone bad, is the ultimate niggabitch and displays that gladly, and for her that means: what?€™s on can come off. If that means she?€™ll be on stage half naked, then so be it. But Dutch winters aren?€™t like Jamaican ones, so pick a clothing style in which your daughter can resist minus ten. No to the big sunglasses and the pornheels, and yes to the tiger print, pink shizzle and everything that glitters. Now let?€™s hope she won?€™t beat anybody up at daycare.?€?

Calling anyone “niggabitch” is already terms for a beatdown of epic proportions, but to add ethnic insult to racial injury, the kids at Jackie didn’t even bother to acknowledge Rihanna’s proud Bajan roots. Shortly after realizing that this was just about the dumbest thing to come out of a magazine since FHM‘s glowing portrait of Andrej Pejic, editor-in-chief Eva Hoeke issued a half-assed apology on the mag’s Facebook page, claiming it was all a joke gone horribly wrong. Rihanna, however, was not having it and once again took to Twitter? to voice her righteous indignation:

“@evajackie I hope u can read english, because your magazine is a poor representation of the evolution of human rights! I find you disrespectful, and rather desperate!! You ran out of legit, civilized information to print! There are 1000?s of Dutch girls who would love to be recognized for their contributions to your country, you could have given them an article. Instead, u paid to print one degrading an entire race! That?€™s your contribution to this world! To encourage segregation, to mislead the future leaders to act in the past! You put two words together…@evajackie with the intent of abasement, that made no sense?€¦’***** BITCH’?!?€¦.Well with all respect, on behalf of my race, here are my two words for you?€¦FUCK YOU!!!”

Methinks RiRi may have had a little help drafting this Dutch doucehbag diatribe based solely on its level of coherence, but that is neither here nor there. For the first time in, well, forever I’m impressed with Rihanna. Aside from that bit of musical perfection known as “We Found Love,” Rihanna has given me a new reason not to dislke her. Dammit. [Fashionista]