Forbes’ 30 Under 30: Or, Why You Should Probably Step Your Game Up

Aaliyah once said “Age Ain’t Nothin’ but a Number.” Of course she was 15 at the time and boinking R. Kelly, but that’s neither here nor there.? Forbes Magazine, always list-happy,doesn’t believe in that mantra and therefore decided to rank the top 30 “disrupters” under 30 years of age, each in twelve categories, including art, media, music, energy, finance and technology. And just after I had finished going through my quarter-life crisis — looks like I (once again!) picked the wrong day to stop huffing glue.

Among the precocious pissants are designers Joseph Altuzarra, Alexander Wang, Chris Benz, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen? and Pamela Love; musicians Adele, Lady Gaga, Justin Bieber, Katy Perry, Rihanna and most of the Young Money roster — Lil Wayne, Drake and Nicki Minaj; actors Chloe Moretz, Jennifer Lawrence and Community‘s Donald Glover; and hiding out in the media category is Tavi Gevinson. And while Jaden Smith made the cut, his hair-whipping, fireball-throwing sister, Willow, is nowhere to be seen. Other notable exclusions include Glee‘s leading ladies? Lea Michele and Chris Colfer, as well as tween fashionistas Elle Fanning and Hailee Steinfeld. Guess they weren’t being disruptive enough.

Click through the gallery for some of the kids making waves while I pass out in a pool of my own vomit. [Forbes]

Adele, 23